We cannot be ruled by our hearts. We MUST go to, trust in, and rely on the LORD Jesus for the appropriate answer.
1 To man belong the plans of the heart, but from the LORD comes the reply of the tongue.
I was reading in Jeremiah 17 this morning and came across these verses:
7 But blessed is the person who trust in the LORD, whose confidence is in Him.
9 The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can know it?
10 “I the LORD search the heart and examine the mind…”
Based upon these verses, we cannot trust our heart because it will deceive and ultimately destroy us; we CAN trust the LORD because He knows the heart and mind of both ourselves and the person to whom we are talking.
I have included this morning a prescription for relationships, particularly marriage (and from the guy’s perspective). I pray that it will help you to “trust the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.”
Rx for Marriage
- Never a cross word (short, unkind, impatient, etc.)
- Speak loving words (conversation, encouragement, building up, protection, compliments, even wooing)
- Arrange for times to be together to talk (letting her guide the conversation as you keep turning it back to her by asking her the questions she asks you)
- Stay away from dangerous topics (previous relationships)Love her in all the love languages:
- Giver her your TIME
- Speak WORDS of AFFIRMATION to her
- SERVE her
- TOUCH her both romantically and non-romantically (hold her hand, rub her back)
- Give her GIFTS (the amount/cost of the gift carries less weight than the thought, so keep most of them small, but give often)
- Apologize–often. Guys often don’t realize when we are hurting those around us. She will explain it to you…
- If in conflict, NO alcohol. Just holding it in your hand can change you in someone you don’t want to be. Find some other way to unwind. If she has any uncertainties or doubts about you or the relationship, your drinking will make her fearful. She needs you to be constant, like an anchor. The alcohol undermines the good and highlights the bad.
- Pray separately and together. It doesn’t have to be long, and having a topic for the prayer helps. Let her know that your relationship together with the LORD is important.
- Have your quiet time with the LORD where she and your children can see you. It’s not about a show, but it is about demonstrating what is important to you.
- Keep yourself accountable to God every day and also to someone every week. It needs to be a person of the same gender—this is important! Also, it helps if the person is a life-long friend and lives in another town, or at least is not someone you work with or go to church with. It’s when you have the same friends that things tend to slip out.
- Make this pledge every day, “I am committed to the LORD and to you, to our marriage and to finishing well.” Now, take every precaution to stay that way!
Abba, I pray that each person who reads this post will take these prescriptions to heart and apply them with his/her mind. May we come to You in prayer ALL THE TIME in EVERY conversation (praying continually) and trust You and Your still, small voice, the one just behind us, as You say, “This is the way, walk in it.” (Isaiah 30:21). Amen.