Arguing to win is actually losing. We must win with a goal. That goal must be connection. Otherwise, we are doing more harm than good.

26 She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue.

When we say something and how we say it are every bit as important as what we say. If a person is angry, it’s not a good time to try to reason with him/her. If a person is belligerent, then reason is not something to which he/she will listen. Also, beware of being lured into an argument on someone else’s terms. IT’S A TRAP!”

What do we look for when we need to tell someone the truth? Considering that this chapter is about the virtuous woman, I have asked my virtuous wife to help me with the following list:

1. We must be able to do it in love.
2. It must be for their benefit.
3. Do I have the right to talk to him/her about the subject?
4. Am I the right person for this task?
5. Am I right scripturally?
6. Is the Holy Spirit prompting me?
7. We must not condemn, but aim for repentance and reconciliation.

This list is based upon Matthew 7:5, 18:15-17, 1 Cor. 5:12-13, John 7:24, Eph. 4:15, 32, Gal. 6:1. I’m sure there are other scriptures we could add. If you run across one, please send it to me!

When it comes to evolution, we must be looking for an opportunity to give the Holy Spirit inroads into the lives of the proponents. Obviously, they have bought the lie and are being fueled by the feeling that they are in control of their own destinies. It’s a powerful feeling. In my own experience, this is what I do:

1. After a quick prayer, I ask the person if he is really interested in my opinion.
2. If no, then I get out of the conversation as quickly as possible, skipping to #6 if I can.
3. If yes, then I ask him to figuratively remove himself from the Judge’s seat and allow God to be on His throne. In other words, don’t accuse God and demand Him to explain Himself–even through me. It gives the person the right heart attitude.
4. I must word the argument in a way that gives the person an out. It’s called “saving face.” It’s important for their dignity.
5. The problems I have with evolution are:
   1. We cannot get life from non-life. Chemical reactions cannot produce life under the natural physical laws.
   2. Higher information from low information on a cellular level cannot happen. The information must be latent from the beginning.
   3. There is no way around irreducible complexity. Everything in life has a complexity about it that cannot be reduced past a certain point.
   4. There is no room for God in evolution. Reason itself comes from Him. To argue the point of evolution is self-defeating.
   5. This conversation today has the potential of the person being introduced to the Creator of the universe. Ask him if he is willing to ask God to reveal Himself to him.
6. Personal testimony is important. Tell him about the time you met Christ.
7. Be willing to wait for an answer. Also, try to end the conversation on an amicable note.

It’s all about connection. We have no idea when or how the Holy Spirit will use the information. We just know that He will and we pray that he listen to Him.

This subject will be coming up more and more often at work and church as secular humanism continues to take over our public schools. We must “be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you [us] to give the reason for the hope that you [we] have. But do this with gentleness and respect…” 1 Peter 3:15.

Abba, I can only think that You are preparing me for many of these kinds of conversations. May they be spiritual ones and not just academic ones. I want them to matter in people’s lives concerning their relationship with You. I realize that ultimately the decision comes down to them; my job is to be a witness and the messenger. YOU do the convicting and YOU do the saving–if they receive the Truth and are willing to receive You. Use me, Abba, as You see fit. I am Yours. Amen.

2 Timothy 2:24-26 (NIV)

24 And the Lord’s servant must not quarrel; instead, he must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not resentful. 25 Those who oppose him he must gently instruct, in the hope that God will grant them repentance leading them to a knowledge of the truth, 26 and that they will come to their senses and escape from the trap of the devil, who has taken them captive to do his will.