It’s simple: Guys, use loving words, tone and look; gals, use respectful words, tone and look. Why is it so hard?!
 A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.
Many times, we get impatient, we have expectations, or have a history, and speak unlovingly/disrespectfully. The recipient of such action then has the choice of responding correctly or to create “the Crazy Cycle.” Thank you, Dr. Emerson Eggerichs for that apt description! Solomon says,
 The soothing tongue brings healing and is a tree of life, but a deceitful [spiteful, angry, cruel, etc] tongue crushes the spirit.
Our tongues reveal just how immature we are spiritually and emotionally. James called it:
James 3:2 We all stumble in many ways. If anyone is never at fault in what he says, he is a perfect man, able to keep his whole body in check.
In other words, it’s next to impossible! But, God wants us to learn and to grow, so He coaches us to break bad habits, let go of the past, and to not have unrealistic expectations of each other, especially if they are unspoken or unmet. What is the standard by which He calls us to live?
Ephesians 5:33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
He Himself is the example. For Him, it’s all about the Church, His Bride (Eph. 5:25-27). It is for us, too!!! If we ask Him, He will give us the desire and the power to do His will (Phil. 2:13). The question is: DO WE REALLY WANT TO BE LIKE JESUS?
Let’s commit to be obedient in this area of our lives. I think that we will see that it pervades EVERY area! Let’s finish well.